I am having a rough go of it lately. I couldn’t sleep last night and woke up this morning and could hardly sit for 5 minutes without crying.
Ok, Ok…I know…most of you are saying right now…”and this is different how??”
It’s different because these tears are in total desperation. This is what I cried for this morning:
- my seniors who have lost so much already.
- my other students who have lost this year
- my kids and husband who have to suffer too
OK who I am kidding…my tears this morning were a big old pity party for ME.
I sobbed this morning for ME!!!!
I am stuck in this room, and when I leave this room I have to be very careful.
I have to stay 6 feet from my family, including my dogs.
I have to face the fact that it might be a long time before I am able to do the thing that got me out of bed everyday. The thing that I was put on this earth to do. The thing that has defined my life for so many years.
I love teaching…for so many reasons…all very selfish.
I love teaching choir…for so many reasons…all very selfish.
I love being in a room full of teenagers, singing, laughing, learning, achieving, growing… Not just ordinary teenagers, Westlake High School Choir teenagers.
As I sat there ugly crying, I felt lost, and hopeless, and full of despair.
In that moment, very still, slowly breathing in and out. One word kept coming to my mind.
This word has been constantly thrown in my face during my tenure at Westlake.
I mean seriously.
Grit: **taps me on the shoulder**
Me: turning around “What?”
Me: “ouch that hurt”
Grit: “I’m not going anywhere, do you want to be friends?”
Grit and I have been through a lot of things. Fires, shootings, power outages, bus mishaps, losing an accompanist, scheduling conflicts, calendar issues…
Oh and don’t forget exploding toilets.
Grit has held my hand at the beginning of this journey, when I felt like everyone was against me.
Grit takes care of my students.
The ones who don’t have a lot but give so much.
Those who feel like they want to quit, but seem to keep showing up.
Those who have family issues and academic challenges and language barriers and extra chromosomes and brains that challenge them and demons and constant fights with their self esteem and…
Grit will be with them now. The seniors who have potentially lost so much. The other students who have potentially lost this year.
Because it’s worth it.
Grit: **holds out hand
Me: OK, let’s do this.
All my love,
Mrs. R. (and Grit)
BIRTHDAY’S TODAY!!! – Brodie Rogers and Sanjana Chandrasekar. Please send them some love today. I’m sure it is really hard having a birthday during this isolation. I’ll start…oooooooooooooooooooooo
Didn’t Fitness Marshall today…(see pity party above). Will more than likely take a walk later. Finally the sun is peeking out.
Q.O.D. – Do you have a favorite story about grit, in your life or others? Let’s hear about it!!